Its been almost 5 months since my last post. I guess you could say I haven't been able to bring myself to writing..or even look at my page. It's just a reminder. A reminder of my Mom, of the life I once had with her. It's memories I don't want to forget but are too hard to think about right now..
At some point, maybe even in 9 days, (I'll explain!) I can come back to writing about my grief, my healing, or maybe even just the happy memories..even maybe the not so good memories...
So until then, I was encouraged to journal about an experience I never thought I would do...an experience I never thought that even if I had tried it, I would never finish it.
So here it is. I'm doing a cleanse. Yes a cleanse. Surprised? I am!
Let me back up a little bit...
Way back in November I decided I was going to commit to start truly taking care of myself. Not like I had never tried before, but this time, I thought, I won't make it through this year if I don't start doing some good for me. So through the wonderful world of Facebook I contacted an old friend from the neighborhood who had become a personal trainer! I'll call her D for short, but you can check her out HERE at Body Revolution!
Since then I have been training with her in her sweet little apartment in the city. She has been and continues to teach me so much about food, health, exercise, and much much more! She truly is helping to bring me back to life and now I couldn't imagine life without our sessions!
Now back to the cleanse. More about D later!...D had told me about the cleanse awhile ago, and after much thought I figured, why not?
Not only would it give me a boost (esp after the holidays), but I could also probably use it!
D also encouraged me to journal about my cleansing experience to not only someday day help others who would want to do a cleanse, but to also encourage health and wellness for those going through tough times. I thought, that's exactly what I should be doing. I also figured it would help me get back into writing...So here I am, and today is DAY 1.
I'm doing the 9 day (yes 9 days!) Isagenix Cleanse. The breakdown is a bit like this....
2 Cleanse Days - You drink all of your meals and have a couple tiny snacks
5 shake days - 2 meals are protein shakes and one meal that is 400-600 calories
2 Cleanse Days - Same as above
I took my weight and measurements yesterday w D, and no I did not take before pics. I can barely stand myself in the mirror, let alone on film!
I promise the next 9 days of posts won't be as long, I won't need to introduce the whole background story!
DAY 1
Goes a little something like this...
I'm so ready for this and I am so determined to finish...I just kept thinking to myself "I know I'm going to be hungry..just stay busy and in the summer..it will all have been worth it!"
I'm on a schedule and the day is broken down like this:
Morning: Cleanse Drink (basically a powder mixed w 8oz. of water)
Mid Morning: Snack which includes these awesome chocolate (for lack of a better word) pellets that are just..not good. Plus 2 other snacks. I had 1/2 an apple and 6 almonds. 1 Natural Accelerator Capsule. Water.
Late Morning: Cleanse Drink
Early Afternoon: Snack (same as above)
Mid Afternoon: Cleanse Drink
Early Evening: Snack..I mixed it up a bit and had a hard boiled egg w 6 almonds!
Evening: Cleanse Drink
I can't believe it. I mean I can, it's not like I've never heard about how cleanses work..but I can't believe I'm doing this.
The day wasn't that bad believe it or not. I just took it one step at a time. Every time I started to get really hungry it was time for either a cleanse drink or a snack. D's advice was to stay busy. So that's what I'm doing. I decided to remodel our kitchen cabinets so I'm now up to my elbows with painting, priming, sanding and cleaning. In reverse order of course =)
I felt determined to not cheat either. Trust me the trip to the food section at Target for my brother didn't help. Nor did making him Mac n Cheese and Pasta...but I didn't cheat! I didn't even test a noodle! I was pretty proud of myself for that!
I'm trying so hard to push the negative thoughts out of my head...they go like this...
"Knowing me and my body I bet at the end of this nothing will have changed..."
"I'm so hungry how the hell am I going to do this for 8 more days...."
"How am I going to possibly work out! I don't even have the energy to think at this point!"
I think my biggest fear is that my weight and measurements are going to have NOT changed at the end of my 9 days. I know, maybe you're thinking how is that possible...well what if it is!?! Ok ok...this is probably just my lack of confidence and self-esteem talking here...but truly I'm fearing the worst. I really am determined to finish the whole thing and get some results! Let's see how I feel after tomorrow right!
It's about 10p.m. and I'm hungry and have a bit of a headache...Did I mention I had to give up alchohol and caffeine too!
I figure at this point it's just time for bed! I'm going to hopefully sleep well and think about my DAY 2. If I think about it enough and prepare myself for the day..I'll know what to expect and will have more strength to fight the temptations!
I can do this. At least that's what I'm going to continue to tell myself. It's only 9 days and at the end of it all...hey, I may come out of it healthier and stronger!
So off to bed I go! Til tomorrow!
To you and your empty or full tummies......goodnight and sweet dreams!
At some point, maybe even in 9 days, (I'll explain!) I can come back to writing about my grief, my healing, or maybe even just the happy memories..even maybe the not so good memories...
So until then, I was encouraged to journal about an experience I never thought I would do...an experience I never thought that even if I had tried it, I would never finish it.
So here it is. I'm doing a cleanse. Yes a cleanse. Surprised? I am!
Let me back up a little bit...
Way back in November I decided I was going to commit to start truly taking care of myself. Not like I had never tried before, but this time, I thought, I won't make it through this year if I don't start doing some good for me. So through the wonderful world of Facebook I contacted an old friend from the neighborhood who had become a personal trainer! I'll call her D for short, but you can check her out HERE at Body Revolution!
Since then I have been training with her in her sweet little apartment in the city. She has been and continues to teach me so much about food, health, exercise, and much much more! She truly is helping to bring me back to life and now I couldn't imagine life without our sessions!
Now back to the cleanse. More about D later!...D had told me about the cleanse awhile ago, and after much thought I figured, why not?
Not only would it give me a boost (esp after the holidays), but I could also probably use it!
D also encouraged me to journal about my cleansing experience to not only someday day help others who would want to do a cleanse, but to also encourage health and wellness for those going through tough times. I thought, that's exactly what I should be doing. I also figured it would help me get back into writing...So here I am, and today is DAY 1.
I'm doing the 9 day (yes 9 days!) Isagenix Cleanse. The breakdown is a bit like this....
2 Cleanse Days - You drink all of your meals and have a couple tiny snacks
5 shake days - 2 meals are protein shakes and one meal that is 400-600 calories
2 Cleanse Days - Same as above
I took my weight and measurements yesterday w D, and no I did not take before pics. I can barely stand myself in the mirror, let alone on film!
I promise the next 9 days of posts won't be as long, I won't need to introduce the whole background story!
DAY 1
Goes a little something like this...
I'm so ready for this and I am so determined to finish...I just kept thinking to myself "I know I'm going to be hungry..just stay busy and in the summer..it will all have been worth it!"
I'm on a schedule and the day is broken down like this:
Morning: Cleanse Drink (basically a powder mixed w 8oz. of water)
Mid Morning: Snack which includes these awesome chocolate (for lack of a better word) pellets that are just..not good. Plus 2 other snacks. I had 1/2 an apple and 6 almonds. 1 Natural Accelerator Capsule. Water.
Late Morning: Cleanse Drink
Early Afternoon: Snack (same as above)
Mid Afternoon: Cleanse Drink
Early Evening: Snack..I mixed it up a bit and had a hard boiled egg w 6 almonds!
Evening: Cleanse Drink
I can't believe it. I mean I can, it's not like I've never heard about how cleanses work..but I can't believe I'm doing this.
The day wasn't that bad believe it or not. I just took it one step at a time. Every time I started to get really hungry it was time for either a cleanse drink or a snack. D's advice was to stay busy. So that's what I'm doing. I decided to remodel our kitchen cabinets so I'm now up to my elbows with painting, priming, sanding and cleaning. In reverse order of course =)
I felt determined to not cheat either. Trust me the trip to the food section at Target for my brother didn't help. Nor did making him Mac n Cheese and Pasta...but I didn't cheat! I didn't even test a noodle! I was pretty proud of myself for that!
I'm trying so hard to push the negative thoughts out of my head...they go like this...
"Knowing me and my body I bet at the end of this nothing will have changed..."
"I'm so hungry how the hell am I going to do this for 8 more days...."
"How am I going to possibly work out! I don't even have the energy to think at this point!"
I think my biggest fear is that my weight and measurements are going to have NOT changed at the end of my 9 days. I know, maybe you're thinking how is that possible...well what if it is!?! Ok ok...this is probably just my lack of confidence and self-esteem talking here...but truly I'm fearing the worst. I really am determined to finish the whole thing and get some results! Let's see how I feel after tomorrow right!
It's about 10p.m. and I'm hungry and have a bit of a headache...Did I mention I had to give up alchohol and caffeine too!
I figure at this point it's just time for bed! I'm going to hopefully sleep well and think about my DAY 2. If I think about it enough and prepare myself for the day..I'll know what to expect and will have more strength to fight the temptations!
I can do this. At least that's what I'm going to continue to tell myself. It's only 9 days and at the end of it all...hey, I may come out of it healthier and stronger!
So off to bed I go! Til tomorrow!
To you and your empty or full tummies......goodnight and sweet dreams!
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