Happy Mothers Day!

This is me today. I'm putting it all out there. 

I'm just done and I need a break. 

It's Mothers Day today and it's glorious outside!  You couldn't ask for a better day! 

However, I'm not with my Mom today. I'm at home, sick and exhausted. Utterly exhausted. 

I'm pretty sure I have worked myself sick. 

I got home this morning, and cried....and cried...and cried some more.

How can I NOT be with my Mom today? How can I tell her I can't follow through with our plans? 

Forget that I'm sick, forget that I haven't been home in days...I don't want to disappoint her..

so how do I get through the day? 

I of course know the answers to all of these questions. 

Of course Mom, or January, or Nana, or anyone else isn't going to be disappointed in me.

I just can't give myself a break. I'm not good at taking care of myself, and not good at not being so hard on me all the time. 

This is a hard lesson. And it's one I am constantly working on. 

I am so blessed to have the best family and the best of friends to remind me I do need a break, and that it's okay to not be there for everyone all the time. 

I need to be the one telling myself these things. I'll get there someday...I'll get there...

I need to be strong for me too and not feel bad about it. 

Mothers Day last year was spent in the hospital with Mom....Now she is home, and healthy, doing better than ever. Since that day last year, I have fully come to realize that I am deserving of days like today. We all are. We all deserve to take care of ourselves, even if that means sacrificing a bit of time with our loved ones. 

I know my Mom understands. I know she isn't disappointed in me. Maybe it took this Cancer journey for me to realize that I'm not a disappointment to her...but I still need to be reminded of that sometimes...someday I won't need the reminders and I'll give myself a break a little easier!

Whether or not you are a Mom, you in some way have taken care of someone or something and have given someone else inspiration and love. So take the day off and celebrate you! 

You deserve a break!

Happy Mothers Day!